My White Rose

Kate Buck Jr
3 min readDec 16, 2022

This week really made me question my beliefs.

After 15 retreats with Dr. Dispenza and 9 events since Dec 2020…

I came here to reconnect with my friends and celebrate our 2 year anniversary. And I thought I had reached the depths of what I could learn newly here.

At one point this morning, I saw this white rose on the ground during the walking meditation.

I looked around and the whole area of the beach was covered in petals. (someone must have had a special dinner in that area last night.)

I looked up from the sand and petals, and 1700 humans were buzzing about… hands on their hearts.

Overcoming their trauma, and diseases,

Forgiving themselves and others who had hurt them in the past.

Not identifying with the label or diagnosis they had been given.

Practicing being the person they wanted to be when they go back home.

…And it just hit me. And there was nothing to question anymore.

For me, this work isn’t about meditation in the traditional sense.

Healing is happening here.

This work is just a tool to connect with divine and remember both that the creator power is bigger than we can ever comprehend, and yet, somehow we are it at the same time.

I know what I just said doesn’t resonate with everyone. I know this work doesn’t resonate with everyone either.

I’ve done a lot of work. I’ve been to all the seminars. Read all the books. Listened to the YouTube videos and the podcasts. Watched all the documentaries. I went to all the ceremonies and tried all the plant medicines. I went to the healers and energy workers. Hired the coaches. Got my yoga certification. Bought the candles, and the oils and aaaaalll the crystals. Learned to read the oracle cards. I tried all the fasting and the juicing and I took all the supplements. I did the journaling and the breath work. And the saunas and the ice baths. And the cord cutting and and and and…

You name it, I did it.

This work has brought me to my greatest understanding of the meaning of life and how our reality works.

I’ve watched over the last 2 years that I grow into the woman I tried for 2 decades to become doing other work.

I’ve accomplished goals that I worked for over a decade to achieve in 2 years.

This morning, I just decided to stop questioning.

This is the tool that works for me right now.

I feel as close to God as I ever have, and I know that if I go all in, there is so much more for me to learn and accomplish.

I feel both empowered and humbled “at the same time” to move forward with grace and peace, trusting myself and that which is guiding me.

I know a lot of people are searching for answers to the same kinds of questions… I hope you find your “thing” whatever it is that resonates with you.




Kate Buck Jr

📲 Social Media Manager (since 2006!) 🌏 Digital Nomad (since 2016!) 🧘🏽‍♀️ Yogi (since 2015!) 💃🏽 Dancer (since birth!)