Life Lessons Learned from Partner Dancing

Kate Buck Jr
2 min readSep 6, 2022


When I started social dancing 3.5 years ago, I had no idea there would be such a big difference from learning to dance on as an individual and on a team… as I had done for my entire life until about 26 years old.

Partner dancing was about not just about the steps… it is about listening and following (at first) and then later, once the connection has been established it becomes a more of a conversation between dance partners.

The first dance with a new partner is usually challenging as you get to understand their “cues” … because even though the passes are the same, each leader has different timing & style.

Over time and repeatedly dancing with the same person, you get better at following them, and you can relax a bit. The more you relax, the better you follow, the better you follow, the more you relax… it’s a cycle… Eventually, you start to co-lead in subtle ways… For me, that’s when it gets really fun.

Sometimes, you vibe right away and before the end of one song you’re already doing challenging passes!

Sometimes, you never get in sync no matter how much you try. Sometimes it’s one person’s fault or the other… Sometimes it’s no one’s fault at all… You are both good dancers, you’re just not energetically aligned in that dance or with that partner in general. This is when you really have to give up any cares and just have fun because trying to force the flow makes it worse.

How like life, right?

I could go on and on (and I probably will in the future) about everything I’ve learned about life from partner dancing…

What’s great about this is every time you dance, you get to practice what it looks like to be a great partner!

Even though I don’t have a romantic partner, I do experience partnership in lots of other ways — with my friends and family; my peers and colleagues; my clients and team.

I try to bring these lessons from the dance floor to my everyday life as much as I can!



Kate Buck Jr

📲 Social Media Manager (since 2006!) 🌏 Digital Nomad (since 2016!) 🧘🏽‍♀️ Yogi (since 2015!) 💃🏽 Dancer (since birth!)